Post by Deleted on Jan 25, 2015 17:13:36 GMT
Name|: - Yellowkit > Yellowpaw > Yellowstone
Gender|: - She-Cat
Age|: - 22 Moons
Sexuality|: - Heterosexual
Sexually Active|: - No
In heat|: - No [0%]
Pregnant|: - No [0%]
Pregnant|: - No [0%]
Loyal to|: - Breezeclan
Nobilities|: - Warrior
Birth Clan|: - Breezeclan
Birth Place|: - Breezeclan Nursery
Mentor|: - None
Past Mentor|: - Birdleg
Apprentice|: - Foxpaw
Former Apprentice|: - None
Breed|: - Savannah Cat [F5] = Bengal x Tabby x Wild Cat
Pelt|: - Yellow
Underfur|: - Cream
Markings|: - Serval
Accessories|: - None
Eyes|: - Green
Whiskers|: - Medium & Straight
Tail|: - Long
Size|: - 31''
Weight|: - 9.5lb
Length|: - 18''
Preset|: - None
Likes|:
Kittens - Easily one of the few things Yellow enjoys more than cleaning is spending time with kits and developing her motherly skills.
Cleaning - Waking up at the crack of dawn every day to clean camp, not much can put Yellow in a better mood. "Happy Camp, Happy Clan."
Waking Early - How else is she supposed to clean, hunt, groom and socialize unless she wakes up early?
Being Useful - What's the point in being around if you're not useful? Yellow makes it one of her number one goals to be of use.
Cleaning - Waking up at the crack of dawn every day to clean camp, not much can put Yellow in a better mood. "Happy Camp, Happy Clan."
Waking Early - How else is she supposed to clean, hunt, groom and socialize unless she wakes up early?
Being Useful - What's the point in being around if you're not useful? Yellow makes it one of her number one goals to be of use.
--
Dislikes|:
Mud/Dirt - Mud and Dirt equal mess, and mess doesn't sit too well with Yellow.
Water - Water usually leads to a messy pelt. Yellow likes to take pride in her appearance, she can't do that if she's soaked!
Rain - Rain causes mud. Mud is mess. Rain also causes a wet pelt. Need I say more?
Slimy Things - Who in their right mind does like slimy things? Slime is usually associated with dirty things, too.
Bullies - If you're a bully, stay out of Yellow's way. She will shoot you so far down you won't be able to get back up again.
--
Fears|:
Birds of Prey - They usually steal her hunts, she's just thankful none have stolen her... yet.
Aggressive Cats - Though skilled in combat, Yellow would rather avoid a mean cat than befriend one.
Mess/Dirt - Being messy, seeing mess, it can lead her into panicking.
Aggressive Cats - Though skilled in combat, Yellow would rather avoid a mean cat than befriend one.
Mess/Dirt - Being messy, seeing mess, it can lead her into panicking.
--
Faith|:
Starclan [10%] > Losing faith
--
Wishes|:
For Starclan to prove itself.
Dam|: - Blackfoot - Missing
Sire|: - Sunrock - Missing
Kin|: - Redstone [Missing] x Bluestone [Missing] x Greystone [Missing] x Whitestone
Adoptive Mother|: - None
Adoptive Father|: - None
Half Kin|: - None
Blood Kits|: - Turtlekit, Dawnkit, Blackkit, Sandkit, Dustkit, Finchkit, Amberkit, Deadkit
Adopted Kits|: - None
--
Strikout [
Unsure | Neutral | Curious | Like | Really Like
Protects | Friend | Best Friend | Trust | Respect
Crush | Infatuated | Love | Mate | Family
Fear | Dislike | Hate | Loathe | Deceased | Miss
--
Fear | Dislike | Hate | Loathe | Deceased | Miss
--
Featherstar - "From what I've seen of you, you are a great leader. I expect great things."
Blackfire [oo]- "My darling, you shouldn't have fought so hard... I know you were angry and felt betrayed, but I feel empty without you. I fear that I will not be able to answer our kits when they ask where you are. When they realize they're supposed to have a daddy. I fear that I will break down and the poor souls will think they've done something wrong. I'm trying to be strong, but I miss you too much. Please visit me sometimes.
Ruesplash - "I have to say, you know how to intimidate a cat... I may have to keep my distance from you, even if you are cute."
Talonheart - "I don't know you well, but you protected me that one time that loner appeared. For that, I thank you.
Shadowclaw - "Believe me, a little information won't make us friends. I trust you, but I have to know you before I consider you a friend... Maybe I should approach you... Maybe.
Sootkit - "You are simply adorable. I will protect you with my life if I have to."
Foxpaw - "As your mentor, I can say you're learning quickly. But as your friend, I can say I love you dearly and that I feel safe around you, despite you being a fox."
Turtlekit - "My first born kit. I love you dearly, and I hope you grow into a beautiful, brave warrior. You and your brothers and sisters are my world."
Dawnkit - "My second born kit. You are simply beautiful. I can see you as a warrior already, you will be just as perfect then as you are now. You and your brothers and sisters are my world."
Blackkit - "My third born kit. You are the spitting image of your father, and I hope you grow to be just like him. Make me proud and be a brave warrior. You and your brother and sisters are my world."
Dustkit - "My fourth born kit. You look nothing like me or your father, but I love you all the same. You're a spunky, possessive little thing, but that's what makes you special. You and your brother and sisters are my world."
Sandkit - "My fifth born kit. I'm sorry. I should have seen this sooner. You weren't shy at all, you were sick... I wish I could have helped you..."
Aspenkit - "My sixth born kit. You truly are a darling. You were a smooth birth and are a sweet little kitten. You will certainly be loved by those around you when you grow up. You and your brothers and sisters are my world."
Amberkit - "My seventh born kit. You are my youngest living kit, and my smallest. You are beautiful beyond words, and I hope you grow to be a cat who is as loving as myself and your father. You and your brothers and sisters are my world."
Deadkit - "My eighth born kit... I'm upset that you didn't live, my child. But I believe it is for the best. Starclan makes the decisions that I can not, and I pray for you every night, hoping you are at peace where you are. You and your brothers and sisters are my world."
Talonheart - "I don't know you well, but you protected me that one time that loner appeared. For that, I thank you.
Shadowclaw - "Believe me, a little information won't make us friends. I trust you, but I have to know you before I consider you a friend... Maybe I should approach you... Maybe.
Sootkit - "You are simply adorable. I will protect you with my life if I have to."
Foxpaw - "As your mentor, I can say you're learning quickly. But as your friend, I can say I love you dearly and that I feel safe around you, despite you being a fox."
Turtlekit - "My first born kit. I love you dearly, and I hope you grow into a beautiful, brave warrior. You and your brothers and sisters are my world."
Dawnkit - "My second born kit. You are simply beautiful. I can see you as a warrior already, you will be just as perfect then as you are now. You and your brothers and sisters are my world."
Blackkit - "My third born kit. You are the spitting image of your father, and I hope you grow to be just like him. Make me proud and be a brave warrior. You and your brother and sisters are my world."
Dustkit - "My fourth born kit. You look nothing like me or your father, but I love you all the same. You're a spunky, possessive little thing, but that's what makes you special. You and your brother and sisters are my world."
Aspenkit - "My sixth born kit. You truly are a darling. You were a smooth birth and are a sweet little kitten. You will certainly be loved by those around you when you grow up. You and your brothers and sisters are my world."
Amberkit - "My seventh born kit. You are my youngest living kit, and my smallest. You are beautiful beyond words, and I hope you grow to be a cat who is as loving as myself and your father. You and your brothers and sisters are my world."
Kraitflare - "I don't know what to think of you... Manipulating a fox? That's just cruel. But I can't hate you. I still hate my mother too much to spare hate for anyone else.
Red[pelt] - "You're an odd cat... Aren't you? You keep coming back to our territory, you're going to get yourself into trouble! I'll admit though, I'm curious about you. I want to see if a cat really can change its personality."
Red[pelt] - "You're an odd cat... Aren't you? You keep coming back to our territory, you're going to get yourself into trouble! I'll admit though, I'm curious about you. I want to see if a cat really can change its personality."
N/A
N/A
x=2 | o=1
Hunting|: 34/60
Mice- xxxx
Squirrel- xxxx
Rabbit- xx
Thrush- xxxo
Sparrow- xx
Vole- xo
Combat|: 81/100
Strength- xxxo
Stamina- xxo
Speed - xxxxx
Speed - xxxxx
Stealth- xxxx
Skills - xxxx
Balance - xxxxx
Skills - xxxx
Balance - xxxxx
Intelligence- xxxxx
Agility- xxxx
Reflex- xxxxo
Accuracy- xxx
Social|: 57/60
Speech- xxxxx
Leadership Skills- xxxo
Mental Health- xxxxx
Illness Health- xxxxx
Immune System- xxxxx
Maternal Instinct- xxxxx
Total|: 172/220
Total|: 172/220
'She looks like a Goldkit... Let's name her Goldkit.'
'I don't like that. She's not special enough.'
"To hear those words, only a fuzzy mess of unidentifiable noises, it took me until I was a young warrior to figure out exactly what had been said by my parents. I had known for a long time that I was treated differently to my siblings. I was the last to eat, I wasn't allowed to speak unless I was spoken to, I wasn't allowed to play, or explore the camp. My days as a kit were spent curled up in the back of Breezeclan's nursery on the only cold portion of the ground there was. I thought it was normal. That I was simply a bad kit. I was told it enough times 'You're a bad girl, you know that.' It was drilled into me enough that I simply began to believe it. At least my sisters left me alone. They were allowed out to play, they were the good kits. Oh I was so envious of them... I was only ever visited by one of my siblings, and while I cherished the company, I despised the tom. My older brother, Whitepaw at the time. He was a bully right down to his core. I would be pushed around, shoved into walls, bitten, clawed at, shouted at for nothing in particular. And the worst part was, the cat who was supposed to love me, care for me, hold me close and promise that the world is a bright place and that I was going to grow into a beautiful cat one day, simply sat and watched him. I would cry for her to help me, call for her help, but she simply looked in the opposite direction.
Whitepaw would only ever stop when my father returned from his patrols. I was his born identical, I looked exactly like him in every way. I guess that's why my mother hated me. Because she believed that my father loved me more than he loved her. Which was quite possibly true. Her hatred for me revealed her true colours.
All of the love and affection I felt came from my father. He was my saviour. Thanks to him, I was allowed to have time out in the open, even if only for an hour before I was sent back in to bed. My mother wouldn't argue with him. Of course she wouldn't, he was the deputy. It was simply easier for her to let him have his way... When he was there, of course.
Moons pass and we all grow. My sisters are outgoing and friendly, while I am withdrawn and shy. I flinch at the slightest of movements and cower whenever cats pass me by. They give me funny looks and my mother's words are only enforced. 'You're a bad girl.' If the rest of the clan believed it, then it must have been true. My brother still hits me, and sometimes draws blood now that I'm older. I can't fight back though. If I do, then mother hurts me too. Finally, we're called for a clan ceremony, we're going to get mentors! Hope filled in me, maybe my mentor would be nice, maybe they would let me play and have fun. I could get away from Whitepaw when training, too! My hope is immediately crumbled, however when I spot my mother whispering to the leader and then pointing at me. The pair nod to each other and with a stare like stone, she makes her way over to me and settles down, rasping her tongue along my head. Out in the open, she was the perfect mother, but behind the lichen of the nursery, she was the darkest of nightmares. My sisters were given their mentors first, and they seemed happy enough, and then mine was called out, and I swear I could have drowned in my tears if I'd have let them spill. My mother was to be my mentor..."
'I don't like that. She's not special enough.'
"To hear those words, only a fuzzy mess of unidentifiable noises, it took me until I was a young warrior to figure out exactly what had been said by my parents. I had known for a long time that I was treated differently to my siblings. I was the last to eat, I wasn't allowed to speak unless I was spoken to, I wasn't allowed to play, or explore the camp. My days as a kit were spent curled up in the back of Breezeclan's nursery on the only cold portion of the ground there was. I thought it was normal. That I was simply a bad kit. I was told it enough times 'You're a bad girl, you know that.' It was drilled into me enough that I simply began to believe it. At least my sisters left me alone. They were allowed out to play, they were the good kits. Oh I was so envious of them... I was only ever visited by one of my siblings, and while I cherished the company, I despised the tom. My older brother, Whitepaw at the time. He was a bully right down to his core. I would be pushed around, shoved into walls, bitten, clawed at, shouted at for nothing in particular. And the worst part was, the cat who was supposed to love me, care for me, hold me close and promise that the world is a bright place and that I was going to grow into a beautiful cat one day, simply sat and watched him. I would cry for her to help me, call for her help, but she simply looked in the opposite direction.
Whitepaw would only ever stop when my father returned from his patrols. I was his born identical, I looked exactly like him in every way. I guess that's why my mother hated me. Because she believed that my father loved me more than he loved her. Which was quite possibly true. Her hatred for me revealed her true colours.
All of the love and affection I felt came from my father. He was my saviour. Thanks to him, I was allowed to have time out in the open, even if only for an hour before I was sent back in to bed. My mother wouldn't argue with him. Of course she wouldn't, he was the deputy. It was simply easier for her to let him have his way... When he was there, of course.
Moons pass and we all grow. My sisters are outgoing and friendly, while I am withdrawn and shy. I flinch at the slightest of movements and cower whenever cats pass me by. They give me funny looks and my mother's words are only enforced. 'You're a bad girl.' If the rest of the clan believed it, then it must have been true. My brother still hits me, and sometimes draws blood now that I'm older. I can't fight back though. If I do, then mother hurts me too. Finally, we're called for a clan ceremony, we're going to get mentors! Hope filled in me, maybe my mentor would be nice, maybe they would let me play and have fun. I could get away from Whitepaw when training, too! My hope is immediately crumbled, however when I spot my mother whispering to the leader and then pointing at me. The pair nod to each other and with a stare like stone, she makes her way over to me and settles down, rasping her tongue along my head. Out in the open, she was the perfect mother, but behind the lichen of the nursery, she was the darkest of nightmares. My sisters were given their mentors first, and they seemed happy enough, and then mine was called out, and I swear I could have drowned in my tears if I'd have let them spill. My mother was to be my mentor..."
"My apprentice years were no better than my kit years. In fact, they were worse. 'training' gave my mother more reason to hurt me, and throw me around. I would return from each session exhausted. One cat noticed this, an older apprentice, Blackpaw. He tried to ask me if I was okay, but I ignored him and simply curled up in my nest, my mind blank as I tried to block out the pain. The only thing I was learning from my mother, was how to cope with abuse. Blackpaw tried day after day to get me to talk, but I feared that if I did, he would get hurt to. I considered him a friend, even though we barely talked. Eventually, he stopped asking about my injuries, and began to talk to me more about other things. Things friends would talk about. It was calming, and I soon began to warm up to him. We began to train on our own and I quickly learned that how my mother was training and treating me was wrong. And still, I kept quiet. I feared for my life a lot of the time, I would only fear it more if other cats knew. My father still treated me from time to time, but he was growing more and more busy as the days passed. The leader was old and frail, Starclan would take him soon and the clan knew it.
A couple more moons passed, and on one particular day, my mother's rage peaked and I was left on the verge of death. Staggering into camp, I collapsed into my nest, blood pooling in my yellow pelt. And it seemed only one cat really paid attention; Blackpaw. He asked me what had happened while my mother trampled through camp raging about how a fox had attacked me. Lies of course, a fox would have killed me instantly. I would much rather have been taken by a fox than left to endure my mother's hatred. Through it all though, I didn't hate her in return. She was my mother after all, and there were those rare moments when she would treat me as one of her own rather than an outcast. She would groom me, feed me the larger portions of prey and hold me in a tight embrace. It was those short moments that I held dear and cherished whenever they arised.
I hesitated with answering Blackpaw, but in a flush of tears, it all came out. To my surprise, the tom didn't swipe at me or tell me that my mother was right. He did the opposite. He comforted me and told me that my mother was the bad cat. He told me that what she was doing was wrong and that I should tell Brightstar. But I couldn't. I had only told Blackpaw on impulse. I trusted him. He was my only friend in a world of hatred. I trusted my father too, but Blackpaw was around me more, he didn't have a past with my mother. What would father think if I told him? He wouldn't believe me. When he was around, mother was everything but a bad cat. He had no reason to believe me.
Blackpaw became the cat I confided in every day, and the more I spoke of my mother, the more he seemed to build up a hatred for her. I didn't really understand it, and I felt ever so guilty for giving him such a negative perception of the cat that birthed me. But I couldn't help it. I was simply telling him everything that had gone wrong. I needed to lift the weight from my shoulders; even if it were only a little.
By the time I was nine moons old, Blackpaw had been appointed a warrior and was sitting vigil. Used to having him in the nest beside me, I couldn't sleep that night. My eyes remained wide open, staring into the darkness at the empty nest. I couldn't take it. I made my way out into the open and settled beside the male, curled next to him as he sat his vigil. He didn't seem to mind too much. I uttered a small goodnight, and I fell into a light slumber. I was rudely awoken the next morning by claws jabbed into my side. The culprit? My brother Whitestone [Previously Whitepaw] of course. Hissing out of shock, he swipes his paw across my face and leaves me stunned, staring at him as he screeched about how worthless I was, that I shouldn't be sitting vigil with a warrior, that I was only an apprentice. Blackpaw - now Blackfire - had left during the earlier hours to go on dawn patrol. The camp seemed empty and the few that were in camp seemed to look the other way. I cower before him and back away. I didn't say a thing before I dashed to the apprentice den and dive for cover in my cold nest. Curling up, I tremble, eyes locked on the entrance of the den praying he didn't come after her. I perk my ears to the sound of an elder calling my brother followed by an audible huff. Poking my head out of the den, I spot my mother. She's heavily pregnant - again - and it looked like she was ready to give birth. A few cats nuzzle her abdomen as she disappears into the nursery followed by the medicine cat. I prayed to Starclan that she didn't treat the new kittens like she did me. I prayed that she looked after them the way a mother should. But Starclan didn't answer me. Instead, they simply took the lives of four of the kits. They were stillborn, all looking somewhat like myself and my father. I couldn't help but feel it was a coincidence. Maybe it was because they felt those kits would be safer among the star-warriors than walking with the cats of Breezeclan. And I would agree.
I was called over by the medicine cat, and on shaky limbs I entered the nursery, my eyes quickly crossing the four stillborn kits curled together in a pile. They looked like they were sleeping, and in a way, I suppose they were. They'd just never wake up. I looked to the only remaining kit and smiled with relief. He looked nothing like me; he looked like a carbon copy of my mother, if anything. That meant he was safe. My mother announced his name proudly, but I can't remember what it was. I hadn't known him for very long. A moon at most.
Scurrying from the nursery after giving him a quick lick, I bounce toward the entrance of camp and sit, staring out into the open, waiting for my father and Blackfire to return so that I could tell them the good news. I was more excited to tell Blackfire than I was my father. When he came into camp, following my father, I darted toward him and aimed to headbutt his chest, but my paw crippled under my weight and I slammed into the ground, crying out in pain and biting back tears. I'd completely forgotten that there was still an open wound over the top of it. The patrol immediately helped me to my feet, my father insisting I go to the medicine den. As usual, I refused claiming I would be okay as I rasped my tongue over it. Not too sure on my decision, he asked the medicine cat to take a look at my paw. She didn't say much about it other than I should be careful. She gave me some poppy seeds and wrapped my paw, but said nothing more. She seemed much more distant than usual, like something was on her mind. I didn't question it. By the time she'd finished, both Blackfire and my father knew about my younger brother and while my father was thrilled, my friend was quite unimpressed. I tried to explain to him that she'd treat him better, but he didn't believe me.
Skip forward a moon and my mother's focus is taken off me. I'm given a new mentor and actually begin to learn the basics of a warrior. I was grateful for my lessons, they gave me time away from my mother. I trained so hard, I wanted my mentor to be proud of me, and he was. He was surprised at how little I knew, and how much I learned in such a small space of time. There was hope for me yet. On my way into camp after a training session with my new mentor, I spot my mother poking her head through the lichen, only to disappear back into the nursery. I thought nothing of it, she was a nosey cat. Heading to the fresh kill pile, I pull out a mouse and settle down to eat. Only half way through my meal, I spot my mother leaving the nursery with my brother between her jaws. Watching her leave camp, I frown and rise from my food. Queens weren't supposed to leave camp with their kits. Glancing around, I inform my father who took off after her, telling me to stay behind with Whitestone. I did as I was told... For a moment or two. Giving in to the slight fear that they may leave all together, I sneak out of camp and begin to follow their scent, my training in tracking paying off. I eventually catch up to them, but by this point, my lungs were burning.
Keeping a distance, I found it harder and harder to breathe as I followed. A warm, smoky scent wafted my way, carried by a gentle wind that quickly grew vicious, snapping at my face as the scent grew thicker, clouding my senses. I was thrown off my feed one or twice by the sheer aggressiveness of the heated winds, but I was able to quickly find my feet again and take cover behind a boulder. I was far too young to be out here on my own, my heart was pounding and I feared I wouldn't find my way home again. I peer from behind the boulder and tremble. They'd crossed the border and were still going. I was scared to follow, I was ready to turn and run back to camp. But then I saw my sisters, Bluepaw and Greypaw. They were the same age as me. Why were they out alone?
My parents made their way over to them, my father looked frantic, his eyes pleading as he tried to reason with his mate. I couldn't understand what they were saying, they were too far away. All I managed to hear, was the muffled, constantly repeated word 'Please'. Where were they going?
Smoke stabbed at my lungs, crawling down my throat with claws sharper than a young warrior. It wasn't long before I was coughing and wheezing.I covered my mouth with my paws quickly, peering behind the rocks carefully as my mother looked back with a face full of pure rage. She hadn't seen me, but she'd heard me. I watched as she huffs, turns her back on me and begins walking again. Crawling from behind the rocks, I finally move my paws from my mouth as flashes of red pool in my eyes. I didn't know what they were at the time, but I know now that what I saw was fire. The forest was burning, and they were walking right toward it. I picked up my pace, bouncing clumsily after them, but they were too far ahead for me to catch up. Heat waves distorted my vision, the smoke thrown at my face, my lungs burning. The flames were beautiful, but I knew that if I got too close to the blazing heat, it would most definitely hurt. Just being at that distance hurt. I feared getting any closer, so I simply stood there and watched as my mother turned to look at me, her eyes thick with hatred, her expression mocking me as a sly grin spread across her features. She was leaving me behind... And so was my father, my sisters and my baby brother. She turns her back on me again and heads into the burning forest, her form quickly engulfed by the flames. My father hadn't noticed me in the distance, he was too busy trying to stop my sisters from following my mother. But she had too much control over them. They were her miniature slaves. They did as they were told, when they were told. Following her into the flames, my father hesitated, bouncing back and forth before the wall of flames before pausing for a moment and dashing through the amber glow.
And just like that, they were gone. My mother had taken everything from me. My confidence, my dignity, my sense of security... And now the one thing I loved the most. My father. She had successfully ruined the very thing I held most dear. She had killed him. She had killed my sisters, my baby brother, and presumably herself. Her selfishness, her hatred was the bane of my life. I had never hated a cat before. But I hated her. And I will always hate her. With every strand of fur on my body, with every fibre within my being, I hate her.
And I hate myself... I watched them walk into that fire. I watched them disappear behind the wall of red. And I did nothing...
Still struck with grief as I returned to camp, I reported what I'd seen to the leader, and though she was upset with me for leaving camp, alone, she was more upset that her deputy had likely perished in the flames. I was sent to my nest, but that was where I planned to go anyway. I passed Blackfire, ignoring his call to me and dropped into my nest, sobbing gently to myself. I was left with Whitestone. I was left to feel the wrath of every painful blow he could bring down on me. I was left to fend for myself. I couldn't... I couldn't stop crying. My whole family, all but one, were gone. By the time the next day rolled around, I was lifeless, a shell of my former self. Warriors would point and stare, whisper to one another, but I didn't care any more. Blackfire would try to talk to me, but I was too depressed to want to talk to him in return. I was bottling up my emotions, and I think he saw that because he grabbed me and held me in an embrace until I broke down again. And from that short moment of affection, I knew I wasn't alone. Blackfire would always be there to comfort me, just as he always had.
After my parent's supposed death, I began to sleep in the warrior's den in Blackfire's nest. The leader didn't seem to mind, at least I assumed she didn't. She never said anything otherwise. All called for a clan meeting, we learned of our new deputy, Elkheart. I didn't know much of the cat, but I hoped they would be a great leader like my father would have been.
Through the rest of my apprentice years, I was beaten daily by my brother, and struggled with my training. I was constantly in pain, and the only thing I looked forward to, was cuddling up next to my only friend. I had begun to understand life more and more, that it wasn't always fair, and that you couldn't always get what you wanted. Life was cruel to me, much more cruel to me than it was to most. But I learned to live with it. I had Blackfire to help, and that was all I ever needed.
I had to stay an apprentice longer than most because of how slowly I Was learning, but it didn't bother me all too much. By the time I was 14 moons, Elkheart had died and a new deputy placed, Featherwhisker. She was a young deputy, the youngest the clan had seen for a long time. But she was a nice cat, Definitely worthy of the deputy rank. Only a few nights later, Acornstar passed away with Featherwhisker at her side. When she exited the former leader's den, cats seemed to erupt into chanting. 'Featherstar' They called out repeatedly. I was genuinely too scared to follow their lead and slunk into the shadows. In her first clan meeting, she appointed me a warrior; my new name being Yellowstone. I was so happy. I'd finally learned all that I needed to to be considered a warrior. Sitting vigil that night, I was shocked to find Blackfire settle next to me, curl up and go to sleep. It bought back many memories, and I spent the rest of the night with a smile on my face. I couldn't have asked for a better friend."
A couple more moons passed, and on one particular day, my mother's rage peaked and I was left on the verge of death. Staggering into camp, I collapsed into my nest, blood pooling in my yellow pelt. And it seemed only one cat really paid attention; Blackpaw. He asked me what had happened while my mother trampled through camp raging about how a fox had attacked me. Lies of course, a fox would have killed me instantly. I would much rather have been taken by a fox than left to endure my mother's hatred. Through it all though, I didn't hate her in return. She was my mother after all, and there were those rare moments when she would treat me as one of her own rather than an outcast. She would groom me, feed me the larger portions of prey and hold me in a tight embrace. It was those short moments that I held dear and cherished whenever they arised.
I hesitated with answering Blackpaw, but in a flush of tears, it all came out. To my surprise, the tom didn't swipe at me or tell me that my mother was right. He did the opposite. He comforted me and told me that my mother was the bad cat. He told me that what she was doing was wrong and that I should tell Brightstar. But I couldn't. I had only told Blackpaw on impulse. I trusted him. He was my only friend in a world of hatred. I trusted my father too, but Blackpaw was around me more, he didn't have a past with my mother. What would father think if I told him? He wouldn't believe me. When he was around, mother was everything but a bad cat. He had no reason to believe me.
Blackpaw became the cat I confided in every day, and the more I spoke of my mother, the more he seemed to build up a hatred for her. I didn't really understand it, and I felt ever so guilty for giving him such a negative perception of the cat that birthed me. But I couldn't help it. I was simply telling him everything that had gone wrong. I needed to lift the weight from my shoulders; even if it were only a little.
By the time I was nine moons old, Blackpaw had been appointed a warrior and was sitting vigil. Used to having him in the nest beside me, I couldn't sleep that night. My eyes remained wide open, staring into the darkness at the empty nest. I couldn't take it. I made my way out into the open and settled beside the male, curled next to him as he sat his vigil. He didn't seem to mind too much. I uttered a small goodnight, and I fell into a light slumber. I was rudely awoken the next morning by claws jabbed into my side. The culprit? My brother Whitestone [Previously Whitepaw] of course. Hissing out of shock, he swipes his paw across my face and leaves me stunned, staring at him as he screeched about how worthless I was, that I shouldn't be sitting vigil with a warrior, that I was only an apprentice. Blackpaw - now Blackfire - had left during the earlier hours to go on dawn patrol. The camp seemed empty and the few that were in camp seemed to look the other way. I cower before him and back away. I didn't say a thing before I dashed to the apprentice den and dive for cover in my cold nest. Curling up, I tremble, eyes locked on the entrance of the den praying he didn't come after her. I perk my ears to the sound of an elder calling my brother followed by an audible huff. Poking my head out of the den, I spot my mother. She's heavily pregnant - again - and it looked like she was ready to give birth. A few cats nuzzle her abdomen as she disappears into the nursery followed by the medicine cat. I prayed to Starclan that she didn't treat the new kittens like she did me. I prayed that she looked after them the way a mother should. But Starclan didn't answer me. Instead, they simply took the lives of four of the kits. They were stillborn, all looking somewhat like myself and my father. I couldn't help but feel it was a coincidence. Maybe it was because they felt those kits would be safer among the star-warriors than walking with the cats of Breezeclan. And I would agree.
I was called over by the medicine cat, and on shaky limbs I entered the nursery, my eyes quickly crossing the four stillborn kits curled together in a pile. They looked like they were sleeping, and in a way, I suppose they were. They'd just never wake up. I looked to the only remaining kit and smiled with relief. He looked nothing like me; he looked like a carbon copy of my mother, if anything. That meant he was safe. My mother announced his name proudly, but I can't remember what it was. I hadn't known him for very long. A moon at most.
Scurrying from the nursery after giving him a quick lick, I bounce toward the entrance of camp and sit, staring out into the open, waiting for my father and Blackfire to return so that I could tell them the good news. I was more excited to tell Blackfire than I was my father. When he came into camp, following my father, I darted toward him and aimed to headbutt his chest, but my paw crippled under my weight and I slammed into the ground, crying out in pain and biting back tears. I'd completely forgotten that there was still an open wound over the top of it. The patrol immediately helped me to my feet, my father insisting I go to the medicine den. As usual, I refused claiming I would be okay as I rasped my tongue over it. Not too sure on my decision, he asked the medicine cat to take a look at my paw. She didn't say much about it other than I should be careful. She gave me some poppy seeds and wrapped my paw, but said nothing more. She seemed much more distant than usual, like something was on her mind. I didn't question it. By the time she'd finished, both Blackfire and my father knew about my younger brother and while my father was thrilled, my friend was quite unimpressed. I tried to explain to him that she'd treat him better, but he didn't believe me.
Skip forward a moon and my mother's focus is taken off me. I'm given a new mentor and actually begin to learn the basics of a warrior. I was grateful for my lessons, they gave me time away from my mother. I trained so hard, I wanted my mentor to be proud of me, and he was. He was surprised at how little I knew, and how much I learned in such a small space of time. There was hope for me yet. On my way into camp after a training session with my new mentor, I spot my mother poking her head through the lichen, only to disappear back into the nursery. I thought nothing of it, she was a nosey cat. Heading to the fresh kill pile, I pull out a mouse and settle down to eat. Only half way through my meal, I spot my mother leaving the nursery with my brother between her jaws. Watching her leave camp, I frown and rise from my food. Queens weren't supposed to leave camp with their kits. Glancing around, I inform my father who took off after her, telling me to stay behind with Whitestone. I did as I was told... For a moment or two. Giving in to the slight fear that they may leave all together, I sneak out of camp and begin to follow their scent, my training in tracking paying off. I eventually catch up to them, but by this point, my lungs were burning.
Keeping a distance, I found it harder and harder to breathe as I followed. A warm, smoky scent wafted my way, carried by a gentle wind that quickly grew vicious, snapping at my face as the scent grew thicker, clouding my senses. I was thrown off my feed one or twice by the sheer aggressiveness of the heated winds, but I was able to quickly find my feet again and take cover behind a boulder. I was far too young to be out here on my own, my heart was pounding and I feared I wouldn't find my way home again. I peer from behind the boulder and tremble. They'd crossed the border and were still going. I was scared to follow, I was ready to turn and run back to camp. But then I saw my sisters, Bluepaw and Greypaw. They were the same age as me. Why were they out alone?
My parents made their way over to them, my father looked frantic, his eyes pleading as he tried to reason with his mate. I couldn't understand what they were saying, they were too far away. All I managed to hear, was the muffled, constantly repeated word 'Please'. Where were they going?
Smoke stabbed at my lungs, crawling down my throat with claws sharper than a young warrior. It wasn't long before I was coughing and wheezing.I covered my mouth with my paws quickly, peering behind the rocks carefully as my mother looked back with a face full of pure rage. She hadn't seen me, but she'd heard me. I watched as she huffs, turns her back on me and begins walking again. Crawling from behind the rocks, I finally move my paws from my mouth as flashes of red pool in my eyes. I didn't know what they were at the time, but I know now that what I saw was fire. The forest was burning, and they were walking right toward it. I picked up my pace, bouncing clumsily after them, but they were too far ahead for me to catch up. Heat waves distorted my vision, the smoke thrown at my face, my lungs burning. The flames were beautiful, but I knew that if I got too close to the blazing heat, it would most definitely hurt. Just being at that distance hurt. I feared getting any closer, so I simply stood there and watched as my mother turned to look at me, her eyes thick with hatred, her expression mocking me as a sly grin spread across her features. She was leaving me behind... And so was my father, my sisters and my baby brother. She turns her back on me again and heads into the burning forest, her form quickly engulfed by the flames. My father hadn't noticed me in the distance, he was too busy trying to stop my sisters from following my mother. But she had too much control over them. They were her miniature slaves. They did as they were told, when they were told. Following her into the flames, my father hesitated, bouncing back and forth before the wall of flames before pausing for a moment and dashing through the amber glow.
And just like that, they were gone. My mother had taken everything from me. My confidence, my dignity, my sense of security... And now the one thing I loved the most. My father. She had successfully ruined the very thing I held most dear. She had killed him. She had killed my sisters, my baby brother, and presumably herself. Her selfishness, her hatred was the bane of my life. I had never hated a cat before. But I hated her. And I will always hate her. With every strand of fur on my body, with every fibre within my being, I hate her.
And I hate myself... I watched them walk into that fire. I watched them disappear behind the wall of red. And I did nothing...
Still struck with grief as I returned to camp, I reported what I'd seen to the leader, and though she was upset with me for leaving camp, alone, she was more upset that her deputy had likely perished in the flames. I was sent to my nest, but that was where I planned to go anyway. I passed Blackfire, ignoring his call to me and dropped into my nest, sobbing gently to myself. I was left with Whitestone. I was left to feel the wrath of every painful blow he could bring down on me. I was left to fend for myself. I couldn't... I couldn't stop crying. My whole family, all but one, were gone. By the time the next day rolled around, I was lifeless, a shell of my former self. Warriors would point and stare, whisper to one another, but I didn't care any more. Blackfire would try to talk to me, but I was too depressed to want to talk to him in return. I was bottling up my emotions, and I think he saw that because he grabbed me and held me in an embrace until I broke down again. And from that short moment of affection, I knew I wasn't alone. Blackfire would always be there to comfort me, just as he always had.
After my parent's supposed death, I began to sleep in the warrior's den in Blackfire's nest. The leader didn't seem to mind, at least I assumed she didn't. She never said anything otherwise. All called for a clan meeting, we learned of our new deputy, Elkheart. I didn't know much of the cat, but I hoped they would be a great leader like my father would have been.
Through the rest of my apprentice years, I was beaten daily by my brother, and struggled with my training. I was constantly in pain, and the only thing I looked forward to, was cuddling up next to my only friend. I had begun to understand life more and more, that it wasn't always fair, and that you couldn't always get what you wanted. Life was cruel to me, much more cruel to me than it was to most. But I learned to live with it. I had Blackfire to help, and that was all I ever needed.
I had to stay an apprentice longer than most because of how slowly I Was learning, but it didn't bother me all too much. By the time I was 14 moons, Elkheart had died and a new deputy placed, Featherwhisker. She was a young deputy, the youngest the clan had seen for a long time. But she was a nice cat, Definitely worthy of the deputy rank. Only a few nights later, Acornstar passed away with Featherwhisker at her side. When she exited the former leader's den, cats seemed to erupt into chanting. 'Featherstar' They called out repeatedly. I was genuinely too scared to follow their lead and slunk into the shadows. In her first clan meeting, she appointed me a warrior; my new name being Yellowstone. I was so happy. I'd finally learned all that I needed to to be considered a warrior. Sitting vigil that night, I was shocked to find Blackfire settle next to me, curl up and go to sleep. It bought back many memories, and I spent the rest of the night with a smile on my face. I couldn't have asked for a better friend."
Before Kits-
"As a warrior, I was expected to do more, but I knew that already. I kept myself as busy as possible so that Whitestone didn't have the chance to hurt me. Most of my days were spent cleaning, and it eventually became an obsessive habit. I hated dirt and everything messy. Blackfire was just as busy going out on patrols and such, and I was a little annoyed that my brother had started talking to him, trying to befriend him. How dare he? As the pair grew closer, I became background noise to Blackfire as I went about my daily routine. I had begun to believe he'd forgotten me, and then one night, I decided to sleep in an unoccupied nest in the warrior den on the opposite side of the cave. Blackfire definitely noticed and I swear I felt his eyes on me all night. Writhing uncomfortably, I pull myself to my paws and exit the den, and then the camp deciding it'd be a good idea to clear my mind with a walk. Making my way to the rock-pile, I leapt atop the smooth boulders and settle down. Only moments later, I felt paws on my back and I rolled over immediately, hissing only to find Blackfire had followed me. Confused, I crawled from beneath him and settle down again, asking him simply how he could be friends with a monster like Whitestone. He didn't understand at first, and I didn't explain myself. He wouldn't believe me. He didn't push too much though, and our indifferent ground dissipated with a short grooming session under the stars. I couldn't help but to fall asleep, nuzzled into his thick pelt. I was delighted when I awoke to find he was still with me, awake and waiting for me. And from there, a small romance blossomed.
I spent more and more time with him, and at some points, it felt as though I used him to get away from Whitestone, but with them two being friends, I couldn't always escape his terrifying glare. It was his violence I feared the most, however, and whenever Blackfire wasn't around, he would hurt me twice as much as he usually would, purely because he couldn't get hold of me more often.
By 16 moons, I had developed strong feelings for Blackfire and I think he felt the same for me, too. He would nuzzle me often, and most of our time spent alone was filled with petty romance. And while neither of us ever mentioned being mates, it was always an option for us. I just knew it, deep down we cared enough for one another. I had also stared to fight back against Whitestone, he didn't bother me half as much as he used to, and he rarely lifted a paw to me. He would simply verbally abuse me and spit or hiss at me. Which I didn't mind much. It didn't hurt like when he hit me.
Only a moon later, I was pregnant. In a moment of blindness, Myself and Blackfire had become... Passionate. And it was then that Whitestone began to up his game, becoming more and more abusive. On one particular day, it was cold and raining outside, and I and Whitestone had been sent out on a patrol. Whitestone took his chance and delivered heavy blow after heavy blow. If it wasn't for Blackfire showing up, I'd have been killed. It was there and then that Blackfire learned what I had meant when I questioned their friendship. In a blind rage, he attacked Whitestone and... I won't go into detail, but by the end of it, Blackfire was badly injured, and Whitestone was dead. I didn't know what to think. I was relieved that the cat wouldn't hurt me again, but I also felt a part of me was missing. I had believed him to be my only living relative.
I tried to help Blackfire back to camp, but half way home, he collapsed. I... I couldn't save him... I cried out in anguish as he breathed his final words and refused to leave his side for hours on end. I draped my frozen body over his and quietly begged that he opened his eyes... He didn't. It took all of my strength to move from him and drag him back to camp. When I got there, I was immediately accused of murdering him. I was gobsmacked. How could they think such a thing?! I explained myself in floods of tears, how he had protected me from Whitestone, that Whitestone was dead and that Blackfire had collapsed on their way back to camp. My only proof was the blood trail.
Some still accuse me of Blackfire's murder, many believe my words. Why would I kill the father of my kits? I sat alone for many moons, barely moving to eat. I was encouraged to move a lot of the time, and eventually, though grief-stricken, I returned to my usual routine. Sleeping at dusk, waking at dawn, cleaning the camp and then grooming myself before repeating the cycle again until I was waddling around camp and losing energy. Featherstar encouraged me to make friends, and I tried, I really did. Ruesplash was a bit of a bully though, so I tried to avoid him. Wolfpaw was usually busy with Sweetgrass, Talonheart was often out hunting. The only cat left, was a kitten; Sootkit. And he spent a lot of time with his brother. Somehow, I managed to befriend the kitten, and from there, I began to make more and more friends. Up until my birth just a couple of moons later."
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After Kits-
N/A
I spent more and more time with him, and at some points, it felt as though I used him to get away from Whitestone, but with them two being friends, I couldn't always escape his terrifying glare. It was his violence I feared the most, however, and whenever Blackfire wasn't around, he would hurt me twice as much as he usually would, purely because he couldn't get hold of me more often.
By 16 moons, I had developed strong feelings for Blackfire and I think he felt the same for me, too. He would nuzzle me often, and most of our time spent alone was filled with petty romance. And while neither of us ever mentioned being mates, it was always an option for us. I just knew it, deep down we cared enough for one another. I had also stared to fight back against Whitestone, he didn't bother me half as much as he used to, and he rarely lifted a paw to me. He would simply verbally abuse me and spit or hiss at me. Which I didn't mind much. It didn't hurt like when he hit me.
Only a moon later, I was pregnant. In a moment of blindness, Myself and Blackfire had become... Passionate. And it was then that Whitestone began to up his game, becoming more and more abusive. On one particular day, it was cold and raining outside, and I and Whitestone had been sent out on a patrol. Whitestone took his chance and delivered heavy blow after heavy blow. If it wasn't for Blackfire showing up, I'd have been killed. It was there and then that Blackfire learned what I had meant when I questioned their friendship. In a blind rage, he attacked Whitestone and... I won't go into detail, but by the end of it, Blackfire was badly injured, and Whitestone was dead. I didn't know what to think. I was relieved that the cat wouldn't hurt me again, but I also felt a part of me was missing. I had believed him to be my only living relative.
I tried to help Blackfire back to camp, but half way home, he collapsed. I... I couldn't save him... I cried out in anguish as he breathed his final words and refused to leave his side for hours on end. I draped my frozen body over his and quietly begged that he opened his eyes... He didn't. It took all of my strength to move from him and drag him back to camp. When I got there, I was immediately accused of murdering him. I was gobsmacked. How could they think such a thing?! I explained myself in floods of tears, how he had protected me from Whitestone, that Whitestone was dead and that Blackfire had collapsed on their way back to camp. My only proof was the blood trail.
Some still accuse me of Blackfire's murder, many believe my words. Why would I kill the father of my kits? I sat alone for many moons, barely moving to eat. I was encouraged to move a lot of the time, and eventually, though grief-stricken, I returned to my usual routine. Sleeping at dusk, waking at dawn, cleaning the camp and then grooming myself before repeating the cycle again until I was waddling around camp and losing energy. Featherstar encouraged me to make friends, and I tried, I really did. Ruesplash was a bit of a bully though, so I tried to avoid him. Wolfpaw was usually busy with Sweetgrass, Talonheart was often out hunting. The only cat left, was a kitten; Sootkit. And he spent a lot of time with his brother. Somehow, I managed to befriend the kitten, and from there, I began to make more and more friends. Up until my birth just a couple of moons later."
---
After Kits-
N/A
"I gave birth to eight. Seven live, one stillborn. The birth seemed easy, while many queens screamed in pain, I seemed to get through it in silence, without biting down on a stick. My secret? I counted. The pain wasn't as bad as all the times I'd been beaten, so it wasn't too new of a feeling. With my friends around me, I was at peace, and too my surprise, a clone of Blackfire was born. Of course, I named him exactly that. The stillborn too, looked like a cat I knew. Whitestone. Somehow, I was glad the kit hadn't survived, but I cried over my loss. He was, after all, my kit. Any mother to hate their kit upon appearance was a terrible mother. And I knew that. I love all of my kittens. They're perfect. I simply can't wait for them to grow into brave young warriors that their father would be proud of. I can see him smiling down on us, watching our every move. I can feel him lying next to me whenever I curl up in his nest. He's there. I know he is... And I will forever believe that he loved me just as much as I loved him."
N/A
Scars|: - None
Strengths|: - Combat x Cleaning x Mothering
Weaknesses|: - Swimming x Hunting
Accessories|: - None
Other|: - Compulsive Cleaner x Compulsive Groomer x Predictable [Routine]
My Skin | Natalie Merchant
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Breath of Life | Florence & The Machine
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Breath of Life | Florence & The Machine
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Medicine | Daughter
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Run | Daughter
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Smother | Daughter
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Beautiful Tragedy | In This Moment
Daenarys Targaryen
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"A mother does not flee without her children."
| Copyright |
-Yellowstone- S k o r i as of September 2014
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-Songs- Rightful owners
-GOT- Rightful owners